Wednesday, April 8, 2009

A Little Panicked, A Little Excited

Tomorrow is a big day for me. Well for me and Preston. Tomorrow will be the first time ever that I have left him overnight. In fact it will be the first time ever that I've left him for longer than say five hours. I am freaking out, and that is putting it mildly. I've even considered canceling last minute. The only thing holding me back is that I am the ride to the concert, I've already bought my ticket, and well I am excited to go.

I've been repeating over and over in my head that he will be okay. Brad will be home with him tomorrow, since work has nothing going on. And while I will miss the paycheck from that day, I am so relieved that Brad will be home so that if Preston does start to get upset Daddy is here. Not that he wouldn't have done great at my Mom's. It's just that sometimes when I drop him off there he goes looking for me around the house. I'm thinking that if he is at home with Brad than he will understand that I'm not at home and that it's "Daddy and Preston Time".

My Mom will also be picking him up to go play at Chuck E Cheese with my little cousins for lunch. I know he will enjoy that. I'm laughing in my head just thinking about my Mom suddenly understanding just how much he keeps you on your toes. No really he does. More than the average 20 month old, I think.

I'm worried about bedtime. Although Brad put him to bed tonight and it went so smoothly. Not a single bump in the road. I'm worried about him waking up in the middle of the night and crying out for me. I'm worried that Brad will forget to feed him. Silly, I know. But I'm still thinking about it. I'm worried that Brad won't dress him warm enough or will dress him too warm. I handle dressing Preston around here. Sometimes Brad grabs the clothes and I send him back down for the specific item I was picturing. I'm worried that Brad will forget to change his diaper. Because it has happened. I'm worried that something or anything will go wrong.

I realize that I'm being extreme. But cut me some slack, I've never done this before. I stay home with Preston which means that he is a constant part of my day. All day, every day for the last 20 months. 29 if you count me being pregnant. And tomorrow I will see Preston before I leave and then I won't see him again until I get back on Friday afternoon. That's more than 24 hours.

On the other hand, I am so excited. I get to go out and have fun with friends, while theoretically not having to worry about Preston. This isn't going to happen, once a Mom always a Mom. Where am I going you ask? Well to a concert. Who's concert you wonder? Why Britney Spears, of course!

I love Britney! I'm not going to lie. As soon as I heard that she was coming to my area, I was all about making plans with my three bestest friends from high school to get us all to that concert. And we're all going. It's going to be like a high school reunion. Only it will just be the four of us.

We're going to go shopping, hit up the concert, and do a little drinking after. Just cut loose and have fun. Relive the days when we were young and had no responsibilities.

I'm sure I'll take a bazillion pictures so I'll be sure to share more than a few with you when I return.

Wish me luck! And say a little prayer that Preston does just fine without me. Although I will be a little sad if he doesn't miss me at all. I know I'll be missing him. And Brad too, of course.

PS. My very favorite photographer is offering up a gift card of her services over on her blog. Jaidean is absolutely amazing at what she does. I love the color and expression that she manages to capture in her photos. Feel free to check it out. And when I win, I'll be sure to share the perfection that she's captured for us once again.


Domrese Family Blog said...

I went through the same thing last fall when we went to a concert. The boys were 3 and I still felt the same way! You're doing way better than I did! :) It was easier than I thought it would be. I DID leave the boys clothing all laid out though. Several outfits for Dan to choose from so he didn't have to worry about that! Have a great time. You will! And Preston AND BRAD will be so happy when you get home!

Tara said...

We all go through it....but it does get easier...and think of it this way...maybe HE needs the break from you ;O) that's how i got over my guilt... they could probably use some time away from me...not just me away from them. you'll do great and so will he! ♥